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4 hours ago, sandyk said:

Seniors Trip. 

 WARNING. May be offensive to some 

 

It was a bus tour for senior citizens.

When they arrived at the Three Sisters, in the Blue Mountains, the driver parked the bus and the passengers made their doddering, unsteady descent to the footpath.

As they filed past, one elderly lady stopped and whispered in the driver’s ear. “I’ve been sexually harassed.”

A few seconds later, another old dear stopped and whispered in his ear. ”Driver, I’ve been sexually harassed.”

This kept happening. Soon seven pensioners had complained – whilst others pointed to an old bloke who was crawling around the floor of the bus, looking beneath the seats.

The driver approached him, tapped him on his back and said, “Excuse me sir, I’d like to have a word with you.”

The old bloke looked up and said, “Of course you can, but not right at the moment. You see, I’ve lost my toupee and am trying to find it. I thought I’d found it seven times – but they were all parted in the middle and mine’s parted on the side.”

Old Redd Foxx joke, except it was on the train. We used to listen to his records when my parents were not home.

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On 9/16/2020 at 4:53 PM, sandyk said:

Two prawns were swimming around in the sea...

 

Groan... Aren't you ashamed? And, if you are not, shouldn't you be? 🙂

"Relax, it's only hi-fi. There's never been a hi-fi emergency." - Roy Hall

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted." - William Bruce Cameron

 

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The only joke worse than a pun is a long pun.

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On 9/16/2020 at 4:53 PM, sandyk said:

TWO PRAWNS:


Two prawns were swimming around in the sea
One called Justin and the other called Kristian.
The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area.

 

Shows that we are all just prawns in the hands of fate (preemptive groaning added here).  

Grimm Audio MU1 > Mola Mola Tambaqui > Mola Mola Kaluga > B&W 803 D3    

Cables:  Kubala-Sosna    Power management:  Shunyata    Room:  Vicoustics  

 

“Nature is pleased with simplicity.”  Isaac Newton

"As neither the enjoyment nor the capacity of producing musical notes are faculties of the least use to man...they must be ranked among the most mysterious with which he is endowed."  Charles Darwin - The Descent of Man

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On 9/16/2020 at 4:53 PM, sandyk said:

TWO PRAWNS:


Two prawns were swimming around in the sea
One called Justin and the other called Kristian.
The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area.
Finally, one day Justin said to Kristian, 'I'm fed up with being a prawn;
I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten.'
A large mysterious cod appeared and said, 'Your wish is granted'
Lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.
Horrified, Kristian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.
Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely.
All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them.
Justin didn't realize that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.
While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn.
He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold,
he found himself turned back into a prawn.
With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail.

 


(The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse).

 


Looking around the gathering at the reef he realized he couldn't see his old pal.
'Where's Kristian?' he asked.
'He's at home, still distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy & became a shark',
came the reply.
Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Kristian's abode.
As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back.
He banged on the door and shouted, 'It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again.'
Kristian replied, 'No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy,
and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner.'
Justin cried back 'No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed.'.........

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'I've found Cod. I'm a
Prawn again Kristian'

 

Can you help me out? I don't understand the joke or the punch line. Why is becoming a prawn again instead of a shark worse than becoming a prawn cocktail? In the first instance the fish is alive and in the second it is dead.

 

3 hours ago, Allan F said:

 

Groan... Aren't you ashamed? And, if you are not, shouldn't you be? 🙂

 

Help, I don't understand what he should be ashamed of.

 

2 hours ago, audiobomber said:

The only joke worse than a pun is a long pun.

 

Perhaps it might help me understand if someone can tell me what pun this joke is telling. Thanks 🤔

I have dementia. I save all my posts in a text file I call Forums.  I do a search in that file to find out what I said or did in the past.

 

I still love music.

 

Teresa

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44 minutes ago, Teresa said:

Can you help me out? I don't understand the joke or the punch line. Why is becoming a prawn again instead of a shark worse than becoming a prawn cocktail? In the first instance the fish is alive and in the second it is dead.

 

It's not worse than becoming a prawn cocktail. The reference to a prawn cocktail is simply a warning to readers that the punch line is not going to be a terrible pun on prawn cocktails, but is even worse.

 

Quote

Help, I don't understand what he should be ashamed of.

 

Puns like this are often referred to as groaners, jokes that are so bad that you should be ashamed to be telling them.

 

Quote

Perhaps it might help me understand if someone can tell me what pun this joke is telling. Thanks 🤔

 

The punch line is a pun on the phrase, "I've found God. I'm a born again Christian" (Cod vs God, prawn vs born).

"Relax, it's only hi-fi. There's never been a hi-fi emergency." - Roy Hall

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted." - William Bruce Cameron

 

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