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PeterSt

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Not professionally, She is a friend of my wife's, who believes her.

 

She also pretends to be a 'Relationship Counselor'. Her three husbands have all divorced her. She can't keep a man for more than a couple of months.

 

We went to see her (for free) one evening. Neither of us could get a word in and it was of course all my fault.

 

Maybe she should try listening rather than theorising. Like some of us, perhaps. And if I want financial advice I don't go to the poorest man in the street.

 

YMMV.

 

Cheers. I assume this thread is about nothing in particular :)

 

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... a thread about "nothing"?

 

Cool!

 

I always liked the "show about nothing" - aka "Seinfeld" ... ;-)

 

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The original thread was actually yet another one for bitchin' about your competition... That seem to be the new trend lately in here. Much more Dynasty than Seinfeld!

 

Go visit your competitor thread and bitch about his product and claim of so-called superiority.

 

It's very chic! Very hip! Very mature...!

 

I guess the OP changed his mind this time around. Therefore nothing.

 

Much ado about nothing indeed.

 

 

 

 

Arcam rDAC / Oppo BDP-83 / NAD 315BEE / Totem Arro

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Go visit your competitor thread and bitch about his product and claim of so-called superiority.

 

Which is exactly what I did not do ...

But which didn't prevent the implications to be inappropriate.

That's why "nothing". I hope we all can live with that.

 

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Which settles more than most threads do...

 

Eloise

---

...in my opinion / experience...

While I agree "Everything may matter" working out what actually affects the sound is a trickier thing.

And I agree "Trust your ears" but equally don't allow them to fool you - trust them with a bit of skepticism.

keep your mind open... But mind your brain doesn't fall out.

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We went to see her (for free) one evening. Neither of us could get a word in and it was of course all my fault.

 

I (luckily) never had an "opportunity" to visit such guys or gals. But, the other day I encountered something and envisioned what would happen ...

 

One has to prepare for all the obvious. It's like school teachers; they are educated in this field somewhat and grab anything they can hook on to so they can show their authority. You always lose because you are not educated in this field at all.

 

Ok, I can imagine that e.g. couples run into problems they can't deal with themselves. In my view this is a matter of not being able to think through things from some distance - not being able to talk to echother well - not being able to be open enough ... that kind of thing. But what if you (think you) can do all this, and still can't find solutions together. Then I am to think a "mediator" can help out ?? I can't imagine this.

 

The problem may get worse when "of course it was all my fault" is in order. By itself you may laugh over it, but watch out for the day your partner tells you "see ?!". Then it is going to work against you. To you both in fact. There's no freedom anymore for other causes etc., because it was said it is your fault. And why ?

 

Well, because you answered "5" to the question how many beers you drink before dinner, while after dinner you fall asleep and your partner now is lacking a few things. Of course you drank too much and it is your fault. The cause of your 5 beers never becomes a subject, while it well may be that you are left alone for two hours because your partner does her (his) too much stinking best on dinners, you not demanding that at all but wait and wait in the mean time.

 

All made up, but you can easily see that things can get complex, and no such shrink will dig that up, or takes the time for it. Only you can work that out, while possibly not even knowing causes etc. So, still complicated.

 

I am coming to the above because I experienced a similar thing with my brother in law. He was virtually kicked out of the house by my sister because of a so called drinking problem (which I never saw happening); had to go to the club teaching to drink less only because the "mediator" said so, and *thus* that was his problem. Again, I never saw it. I also never saw it when he moved in with us (for a year), and what I noticed is that the man (40 years old) was trying and trying, and shivering to call each night for the kids, awaitening another tirade from my sister. I god damn never saw what had happened earlier on overthere, and all I could see is that my brother in law was the most okay guy.

 

It all ended with him getting a desease after he finally went back home and he died. For my sister it was too late to correct things, and nobody in the world knew what really happened, but I do.

My sister started to study this coaching stuff, and created herself a job in helping out kids and partners of persons who died (unexpectedly). She is well known and respected for it, but I don't like it. It's a sneaky thing, though possibly good for her.

 

 

 

 

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Are you 'open for business' this afternoon? I believe you are in the Netherlands? We can get there in a couple of hours :)

 

More seriously, I think so many of these people are complete phoneys. This woman has never done a 'proper' job of any kind in her life She calls herself a 'Counselor'. Guard in a prison camp, more likely. She says "We psychiatrists and psychologists etc. etc." She is neither, she has just taken a few courses, no more. She was also an instructor at a gym (she is a fitness freak). She was thrown out because she is too compteitive with the other instructors. Also because most of the people there are middle-aged women with too much money and too much time on their hands and are there mainly for social reasons. They don't actually want to be in our UK Special Air Services or the US Navy Seals.

 

We don't really have any serious problems. But, like everyone, we have rows now and again. My wife gets depressed sometimes. She takes Prozac. My suggestion that they are not for depression, but for madness, was very constructive and helpful, I thought.

 

It is so easy for these people to set themselves up as 'experts' Anyone can do that. People do not need their advice on such subjects, they just want to 'bend someone's ear' about it, usually forgetting that there are a whole lot of people in the world worse off than they are. And these 'Counselors' take advantage of that. l

 

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There's nothing I hate more than nothing

Nothing keeps me up at night

I toss & turn over nothing

Nothing could cause a great BIG fight

 

Hey -- what's the matter?

Don't tell me nothing.

 

Forrest:

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Are you 'open for business' this afternoon? I believe you are in the Netherlands? We can get there in a couple of hours :)

 

Maybe it was obvious, but there is nothing more fruitful in life for me than being able to help out where otherwise things would end up badly.

It may not be for everyone, but think about how nice it could be when any random person "is able" to empty his heart towards you. Especially women, but this most probably is so because I am not. But it depends, because men tend to be more strong about sensitive things and wouldn't start easy on something like "I met another woman, now what Peter ?". But in the same leage the woman could say "shit, I know he does it with someone else, I want him back, what to do ?".

 

Either case is a sheer challenge to solve. But it starts with probably my eyes telling "so, what's up ? I can see you have more problems than we know ... maybe I can help somehow ?".

 

For a woman, what actually happens is something like a falling in love with that eyes attitude, but merely from the desire to finally solve the problem. At least that is how I think it works. Full surrender first and next hope for the best. Could even go wrong if you know what I mean.

The man ? works similarly. With this above mentioned example I could say "heck man, if it weren't for you and my wife, I had bought flowers for your wife long gone. She *is* special you know ... " (and next give a few examples which will be recognized).

 

Most of these things are about "make the other see". See what is really going on, beyond temporary ad-hoc thoughts and pleasures. Know what you have - don't know what you will get.

Where the "professional" will fail is the unknown history. So, for me it is easy talking (above) because of knowing the persons longer. Being able to have the proper arguments for whatever comes. I couldn't do that to/with your wife of course.

 

We don't really have any serious problems. But, like everyone, we have rows now and again. My wife gets depressed sometimes. She takes Prozac. My suggestion that they are not for depression, but for madness, was very constructive and helpful, I thought.

 

A pitty I can't see whether this continues on the earlier post and the visit to the "counselor" or whether this implied the visit itself (asked for by your wife). Let's assume the former. And for fun of course.

 

So, this is what you really thought (and think). A bit problematic, because madness really can be in order. Now, with some senses in your wife this can be a serious subject to talk about, meaning : when it can be recognized that it can be true. But :

 

What could be more important *and* a better subject to talk about, is what this "madness" is caused by. What I see in life around me, is that it is not difficult to drive people "crazy". Between quotes, but in the end literally. This could be a matter of an intelligent person - way more intelligent than the opponent, and "you" thinking 3 steps ahead of the other, and the other not even being able (or "allowed") to come up with own words and answers. You do it for this person - and you are always right. Do this in a conversation (haha) of 30 minutes, and the other has become totally crazy and now can answer wrongly only. So now he's really in the corner, and you have proven it ...

 

Well ...

Not suggesting this is your case (and remember, we are talking for fun about this) ... try to explicitly turn this around. Don't be the 3 steps ahead thinking guy. Don't reply to all what's read in the newspaper with an "you already told me yesterday" or "yea yea, I am not interested in that".

What may happen is that the need for recognition - that turning out to be a need for attention in the first place, changes to everything being said only once from now on, if at all (recognition is there - respect is there more).

 

It could go more explicitly by means of asking why it needs this 20 minutes stir in a pot where you thought you could leave it alone in the first place. So, now you are even asking about "stupidities" normally brought towards you.

 

... And as a next thing you may find yourself (TH :-) being interested genuinely.

Hmm ...

This would lead to no Procaz being used for either reason.

 

Ok, I tried.

 

 

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Which settles more than most threads do...

 

So, about me ... (??)

 

Since this thread is *the* thread for it (as it seems), around 3-4 weeks back I got the hunch that you finally (?) wanted to tell something. Actually you did. But with so few words (two).

 

When I'm wrong never mind. But when I'm not ...

 

[now I'm thinking of a proper question, which seems hard]

 

Ok, so about those two words. One of those consists of two parts. So, three parts all together. What about you mentioning one of these parts of your choice. When you know what I'm referring to you will be able to do that without telling a thing if you like it that way. With, if you like that better ...

 

So about me myself and I ... This whole thing could be about paying attention to begin with. Without that no clues. No solutions. No changes ...

And "smart" questions. Say, tender ones. Shouldn't work out for the worse.

 

Lush^3-e      Lush^2      Blaxius^2.5      Ethernet^3     HDMI^2     XLR^2

XXHighEnd (developer)

Phasure NOS1 24/768 Async USB DAC (manufacturer)

Phasure Mach III Audio PC with Linear PSU (manufacturer)

Orelino & Orelo MKII Speakers (designer/supplier)

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